DreamingAway

Though my understanding of God doesn’t allow me to say that He can make mistakes, I still catch myself wondering, more often than I’d admit, whether certain things look suspiciously like divine oversights. One of these is this deep, stubborn human need for intimate relationships, especially with the other gender (yes, Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus still feels painfully accurate). And then we extend this need even further and call it marriage. Of course, there are exceptions. Let’s not go into those here. People keep asking: “What are the fundamental requirements for a long-term relationship?” The truth is very clear: you can’t plan and use some magic formula. Nobody has ever found one that actually works. Life refuses to be controlled. A pet, a new neighbour, a surprise visit from a relative—just one single thing from the infinite supply of trivial things can turn everything upside down in a moment. Even if you write the perfect checklist—love, respect, compatibility, kids, f...

Are you one of those people who gets a little spooked by the sudden surge of swiftly moving, dark clouds? You know, the kind that turn the sky a menacing, gloomy grey? I've got friends who genuinely fear that scene. Dark skies can certainly foster feelings of melancholy and sadness, dragging your mood down into the pits of gloom. Ayam Cemani chickens - the Indonesian black chickens — are very rare. Yet they are still forced to sacrifice their lives because they are believed to hold mysterious powers to satisfy evil gods. My dad used to say that whenever a black goat, cat, dog, or hen disappeared, it was often taken for sacrifice. These rituals were thought to have the power to ward off demons. I hate that. How many more centuries will it take for us to stop such practices? From Asian and Greek mythology to African folklore, black has long been a symbol of mystery, danger, and the underworld. We often associate black with, well, a whole lot of dramatic stuff. Despite black's ele...

Love and affection are all open-air prisons here (பாசம் எல்லாம் இங்கே வெட்டவெளி சிறைகள்). How true are Palani Bharathi’s lyrics ! There is a kind of quiet captivity in caring, not because we want to escape it, but because we are never really outside it. A week ago, I was away, and my mother was looking after my dog, Hansie. I gave her all the instructions about his treats. But when she told me he had not touched anything, not even his favourites, I felt heavy-hearted. You know that feeling, if you have ever been there. The more we see, the more we agree to things that once we believed to be meaningless. Vallalar ’s famous words, “Whenever I saw a withered crop, I withered,” speak to many - some connect at a surface level, while others journey deeper to experience their true meaning. I see them sometimes, on buses or in public places. One day, he screamed loudly, apparently for no reason. Another day, she screamed loudly for the same reason. His mother got used to it. Her mother got use...

கோர்வையற்ற வார்த்தைகளாகவே முடித்துவிடப் போகிறேனோ என்ற தோன்றலோடே இந்தப் பதிவைத் துவங்குகிறேன். முன்னெச்சரித்தும் கொள்கிறேன். பரண் ஏறி வெகுகாலமாகி, துருக்கள் துகள்களாகும் நிலையாகிவிட்ட நட்பெல்லாம் இன்னமும் தேவைதானா என்ற எண்ண ஓட்டம்தான் இது. பழையன கழிதலும் புதியன புகுதலும் கால ஓட்டத்தின் கட்டாயமும், மிக இயல்பாய் இந்த உலகமே பழகிக்கொண்டதுமான நியதிதான். மாற்றம் ஒன்றே மாறாதது என்றோ, மாற்றம் என்பதே வாழ்வின் அடையாளம் என்பதோ நாம் எப்போதும் சொல்வதுதான். நட்பின் நிலையும் இதற்கு அப்பாற்பட்டதல்ல என்றே என் மனம் சொல்கிறது. காலத்தின் மாற்றங்களுக்கேற்ப, புதிய நட்பைத் தேடிச் செல்வதும் ஏற்றதே அல்லவா? உண்மையில் பழையது/புதியது, தேவையானது/தேவையில்லாதது என நட்பில் பார்ப்பதற்கு முன், நட்பென்றால் என்னவென்ற ஆழ்ந்த புரிதல் இருந்தால் மட்டுமே இதற்கான ஒரு தெளிவான விவாதத்திற்குள் சென்று பயணிக்க முடியும். நிற்க! ஒரு முனையில் - காலங்காலமாய் ஒரே ஊர், ஒரே பள்ளி, கல்லூரி, ஒரே இடத்தில் பணியென எல்லா இடங்களிலும் தொடரும் ஒரே நட்பு. மறுமுனையில் - பள்ளி முடிப்பதிற்குள் நான்கைந்து இடம் மாறி, ஒன்றுக்கொன்றான தொடர்புகள் அறுபட்ட வாழ...

“ O Arjun, those who eat too much or too little, sleep too much or too little, cannot attain success in Yog ,” says Krishna . And from across the centuries, James Allen echoes : “ He wants to gratify his taste for rich and unnatural viands and have his health as well. Such a man is totally unfit to have health .” Gluttony, after all, is one of the seven deadly sins. (Thank you, Se7en !) But don’t worry, we are not going that deep into guilt and punishment today. When it comes to diet, I am always amazed by friends who can effortlessly resist delicious foods, saying a firm “no” to temptation. Is a little indulgence now and then such a crime? Why practice such rigid self-control all the time? And no, they are not immune to double-chocolate-chip brownies at 4 PM on a Friday. Why not yield to temptation, wisely? (Just for fun, of course, don’t try this at home… unless it’s a tiny bite!). Now consider shopping and discounts, temptation’s playground. Epictetus wisely suggests , “If...

 “Live longer” might be a false claim. Even just “living” may only work if it fits your definition of it. But what if the very clarity of our internal ‘images’ holds the key to both how we interact with others and how we navigate our own lives? Recently, I was in a discussion with a few teammates. I tried to explain a few things that, in my mind, needed fixing. I gave a quick glimpse of the issues, assuming they would catch the core idea. They did. Just not the one I intended. Soon, they were pointing out fixes and efforts for their interpretation, leaving me wondering, “How did we get here?” Well, it is all about assumptions and the mental images each of us sees. A fundamental requirement in communication is not just creating an image but also learning to transfer it to others as accurately as possible. The challenge, however, is that we rarely share the entire image. We assume the listener will fill in the blanks - which they do, but sometimes with the wrong pieces. The result? T...